作者：T·N·達爾 1943年，在克什米爾的首都、以“人間天堂”著稱的斯利納伽（Srinagar），我從我叔叔那里第一次聽說美赫巴巴。我立刻對他產生偏見，因為我聽說他用英語寫文章談靈性，我匆匆下結論說他是受雇于英國人的，試圖把群眾的視線從1942年8月由甘地發起的“退出印度”運動中轉移開。幾天后，我看見巴巴的照片，他顯得很健康，毫無苦行的樣子，這更讓我確信他一定大吃大喝，并且相信我原先的懷疑沒錯兒。 在印度于1947年8月15日從英國人那里贏得獨立之前，很多人都把尋求靈性拯救，或者跟隨古魯圣人，看作是自私的甚至是反國家的追求。他們覺得只要祖國印度的榮譽仍處于危機，每個人的最首要責任就是解放她；那也是我的感覺。 但是兩個月后，我卻做了一個特別的夢。在夢里我看到很多人聚會。我打聽到美赫巴巴中午要來。我的手表是十二點差一刻，我不打算浪費十五分鐘，只是為了見一個騙子。正要離開時，我突然生出一個念頭：我應該留下來，盤詰美赫巴巴——用直接的發問難倒他。他將不知道怎么回答，他將支支吾吾，這樣他就會在眾人面前露餡。于是我等著。 但美赫巴巴中午沒來。到了12:15他還沒到。我又等幾分鐘后，便開始告訴人們美赫巴巴是個騙子，冒牌者。除了他的靈性宣稱，他甚至連個紳士都裝不像，否則他是不會讓我們大家久等的。 然而，過了一會兒，人群開始分開兩邊，給美赫巴巴讓路。我不打算去見他，但他卻向我走來。即便如此，我也不準備向他行禮，但是，當他離我大概六英尺遠時，一股不可知的力量讓我趴倒在地。我從未試圖鞠躬——我沒有鞠躬，只是突然發現自己整個人趴在地上，頭放在巴巴的腳上。我立刻意識到自己抵達了喜樂的源頭。 做了這個夢以后，我變得躁動不安。我醒來時是早上4點，但我跑到叔叔家，請求他告訴我有關巴巴的一切。但除了已經告訴我的，他也不知道更多的。不過，他帶我去見道拉·辛（Daulat?Singh）醫生，道拉·辛僅僅在德拉敦（Dehra?Dun）見過巴巴一分鐘，但這足以讓他完全臣服于至愛巴巴。他對巴巴的臣服和接受是如此地徹底，他甚至從未感到有必要去了解有關巴巴的更多事情。對于他來說，巴巴就是神，這已經足夠了。但在我的乞求下，他總算給我講了他見巴巴的個人經歷，這只能讓我更加渴望親見巴巴。 我寫信給巴巴，說我想去阿美納伽得到他的達善。我收到回信說有合適時機，我就會得到巴巴的達善，但他禁止我在這之前去他那兒。 一年后，1944年，一天晚上至愛巴巴隱蔽身份來到斯利納伽，住在堂皇飯店（Majestic?Hotel）。盡管之前我并不知道巴巴的訪問，但因一系列的巧合，我和一個朋友不僅聽說了這件事，而且我們第二天還去了堂皇飯店找他。? 飯店里沒人聽說過美赫巴巴。他沒用這個名字登記，連飯店里的腳夫也不知道。其中一個十二歲的男孩，對我說飯店里沒有美赫巴巴。我靈機一動，問這個男孩他是否看過日出（山上的日出非常之美），然后我問他飯店里有沒有一位留著胡子長發、就像旭日一樣的人。男孩立刻說，“是的。有一個聾啞王公住在最高層。” 我決定去辦公總處問一下誰住在最高層。往辦公室走時，我們碰巧抬頭看了看，就在那一刻，只有一秒種的時間，至愛巴巴從樓上的窗戶向外望。多么明亮的一張臉呀！ 我們不再猶豫，開始爬樓梯，去巴巴的那層樓。然而，我們到達之前，卻被一個七十多歲但很健壯的男人攔住了。他是馬薩吉（Masaji），彭度的父親（美赫巴巴的姨父——譯者注），雖然我們當時不知道這個。他查問我們想要見誰，我說：“美赫巴巴。”他回答說那里沒有美赫巴巴，他自己已把整個一層樓預定下了，所以我們應該離開。 當我們堅持說我們知道巴巴就在那里，因為我們看見他了時，他說我們看到的只是他的廚師，長得像巴巴而已。于是我說：“你能叫你的廚師來嗎？我們想見見他。”這時馬薩吉突然轉變話題，對我們說他們中有五個生病的婦女，都瀕臨死亡！任何打擾，哪怕我們低聲說話，都可能結束她們的生命，她們的病情都非常、非常地嚴重——患有癌癥，肺結核等等。 我們當然不相信他的話，但最后他不想再多跟我們理論，只是抓住我們，送我們下樓。不過，我們的辯論聲傳到巴巴那里，我們走到樓底時，巴巴傳話說我們可已得到他的一分鐘達善，條件是我們不要把他的身份泄漏給任何人，也不要向他頂禮或碰摸他的腳。 我們欣喜若狂，急切地爬上樓，站在小小的陽臺上等候。巴巴手拿字母板來了。他觸碰了一下前額，譯者說：“巴巴說你們很幸運，我昨天夜里到這兒，你們今天就來了！”接著巴巴要我們放心，說不只是我們，我們的親戚朋友也能在他離開克什米爾前得到他的達善，但要等些時候。 我回到家。但見了巴巴后，我處于一種特殊的心理狀態，以至于那個白天和夜里都毫無食欲。第二天一大早，我又離開家向堂皇飯店走去，希望能再看巴巴一眼——如果他出來散步時。 走到半路，我后悔沒帶些花兒來。就在這時我看見有人手持一大束鮮花，花極為精美，配得上總督的餐桌！我知道這樣一束花即使出高價也不一定能買到，但我一問，這個人就欣然把花遞給我。我很吃驚，給他幾個小錢，他沒吭聲就接受了，隨后二話沒說就走了。巴巴以他神奇的方式，實現了我的心愿。 但是現在我的問題是，我知道我不應該去飯店。我安慰自己說：我不去見巴巴本人，我只是把花交給巴巴的一個門徒或者腳夫，他們會轉交給巴巴的。 我鼓足勇氣，雙手捧著玫瑰花，走進旅館，尋找門徒或腳夫。但一個人都不見。我爬上樓梯。那是怎樣的驚喜啊——至愛巴巴獨自站在那里，好像在等著接受鮮花！他默默地打手勢讓我把鮮花放在他的腳前。我照做了，然后帶著內疚與喜歡交織的心情退回。巴巴微笑著，他的面容比喜馬拉雅山上升起的太陽還要燦爛！ 譯自《恩典的雨露》保·納圖編輯 翻譯：美赫鋒???????校對：田心 原文： **A?Bouquet?at?Baba’?Feet** T.?N.?Dhar In?Srinagar,?the?capital?city?of?Kashmir,?(known?as?“heaven?on?earth”,?)I?first?heard?of?Meher?Baba?in?1943?from?my?uncle.?I?was?instantly?prejudiced?against?Him,?as?I?was?told?that?He?had?written?articles?in?English?on?spirituality,?and?I?jumped?to?the?conclusion?that?He?was?in?the?pay?of?the?British-trying?to?distract?the?masses?from?the?“Quit?India”?movement?which?Gandhi?had?launched?in?August?1942.?A?few?days?later,?I?saw?Meher?Baba’?picture?and?He?looked?so?healthy,?so?unascetic,?that?it?only?convinced?me?that?He?must?have?been?eating?and?drinking?a?lot,?and?that?my?suspicions?had?been?right.? Until?India?won?her?independence?from?the?British?on?August?15,?1947,?many?people?regarded?seeking?spiritual?salvation,?or?following?a?guru?or?saint,?as?a?selfish,?even?antinational?pursuit.?They?felt?that?as?long?as?the?honor?of?the?motherland,?India,?was?at?stake,?the?foremost?duty?of?each?was?to?work?to?make?her?free;?that?was?also?my?feeling.? But?two?months?later,?I?had?an?extraordinary?dream.?In?the?dream?I?saw?a?gathering.?On?enquiring,?I?was?told?that?Meher?Baba?was?coming?at?noon.?By?my?watch?it?was?a?quarter?to?twelve.?I?was?not?prepared?to?waste?fifteen?minutes?hanging?around?just?to?meet?a?fraud.?I?was?about?to?leave?when?the?thought?struck?me?that?I?should?stay?and?cross-examine?Meher?Baba-stump?Him?with?direct?questions.?He?would?not?know?how?to?answer?them,?He?would?fumble?and?thus?He?would?be?exposed?to?the?crowd?as?an?imposter.?So?I?waited.? But?Meher?Baba?did?not?come?at?noon.?He?did?not?even?come?by?12:15.?I?waited?a?few?more?minutes?and?then?began?telling?people?in?the?crowd?that?Meher?Baba?was?a?cheat,?a?charlatan.?Apart?from?His?spiritual?claims,?He?couldn’t?even?pretend?to?be?a?gentleman,?or?otherwise.?He?would?not?have?kept?us?all?waiting.? A?little?later,?however,?the?crowd?began?to?break?into?two?to?make?way?for?Meher?Baba.?I?had?no?intention?of?going?to?see?Him,?but?He?came?to?me.?Even?so,?I?was?not?ready?to?bow?to?Him?but,?when?He?was?about?six?feet?away?from?me,?some?unknown?power?laid?me?flat?on?the?ground.?I?never?tried?to?bend-I?never?did?bend,?I?just?suddenly?found?myself?prostrated?full?length?on?the?ground,?with?my?head?on?Baba’s?feet.?And?instantly?I?realized?that?I?had?reached?the?Source?of?bliss.? After?this?dream?I?became?restless.?When?I?woke,?it?was?4：00a.?m.?,?but?I?rushed?to?my?uncle’s?house,?and?asked?him?to?tell?me?everything?he?knew?about?Baba.?However,?he?didn’t?know?any?more?than?he?had?already?told?me.?But?he?did?take?me?to?see?Dr.?Daulat?Singh.??Daulat?Singh?had?only?met?Baba?for?one?minute?in?Dehra?Dun,?but?that?was?time?enough?for?him?to?have?surrendered?completely?to?Beloved?Baba.?Yet?his?surrender?to,?and?acceptance?of?Baba?was?so?complete?that?he?had?never?felt?it?necessary?to?learn?anything?more?about?Baba.?To?him,?Baba?was?God,?and?that?was?enough.?But,?on?my?entreaties,?he?at?last?told?me?his?personal?experience?of?meeting?Baba,?and?this?only?made?me?more?anxious?to?see?Baba?for?myself.? I?wrote?to?Baba?that?I?wanted?to?go?to?Ahmednagar?to?have?His?darshan.?I?received?a?reply?that?when?the?time?was?right,?I?would?have?Baba’s?darshan,?but?He?forbade?me?to?go?to?Him?until?then.? A?year?later,?in?1944,?one?night,?Beloved?Baba?came?incognito?to?Srinagar?and?went?to?stay?at?the?Majestic?Hotel.?Although?I?had?not?known?ahead?of?time?of?Baba’s?visit,?through?a?series?of?coincidences,?a?friend?and?I?not?only?heard?of?it,?but?the?very?next?day?we?even?went?to?the?Majestic?Hotel?in?search?of?Him.? No?one?in?the?hotel?had?heard?of?Meher?Baba.?He?was?not?registered?under?that?name,?nor?did?any?of?the?bearers?in?the?hotel?know?Him.?One?of?them,?a?twelve?year?old?boy,?had?just?told?me?that?there?was?no?Meher?Baba?staying?in?the?hotel.?On?the?spur?of?the?moment,?I?asked?the?boy?if?he?had?ever?watched?the?sun?rise(the?sunrise?in?the?mountains?is?very?beautiful).?Then?I?asked?him?if?there?was?a?man?in?the?hotel?with?a?mustache?and?long?hair?who?resembled?the?rising?sun.?Instantly?the?boy?said,?“Yes.?There?is?a?deaf?and?dumb?Maharajah?staying?on?the?top?floor.?” ?I?decided?to?ask?the?main?office?who?was?staying?on?the?top?floor.?As?we?were?walking?to?the?office,?we?happened?to?look?up?and?just?at?that?moment,?only?for?a?second,?Beloved?Baba?peeped?out?of?the?upstairs?window.?What?a?luminous?face!? Without?further?ado,?we?began?climbing?the?stairs?to?Baba’s?floor.?Before?we?reached?there,?however,?we?were?stopped?by?a?man?in?his?seventies?who?was?nonetheless?very?strong.?This?was?Masaji,?Pendu’s?father,?although?we?did?not?know?it?at?the?time.?He?demanded?to?know?whom?we?wanted?to?see.?I?said,“Meher?Baba.”?He?replied?that?there?was?no?Meher?Baba?there,?that?he?had?booked?the?entire?floor?himself?so?we?should?leave.? When?we?insisted?that?we?knew?Baba?was?there?because?we?had?seen?Him,?he?said?we?had?merely?seen?his?cook?who?resembled?Baba.?So?I?said,“Can?you?call?your?cook,?we?would?like?to?see?him.”?At?this,?Masaji?abruptly?changed?the?subject?and?informed?us?than?he?had?five?ailing?ladies?in?his?party?and?they?were?on?the?verge?of?death!?Any?disturbance,?even?if?we?whispered,?might?finish?them?off,?as?they?were?all?in?very,?very?serious?condition-suffering?from?cancer,?tuberculosis?and?so?on.? Of?course,?we?didn’t?believe?what?he?was?saying?but,?finally,?unwilling?to?argue?with?us?any?further,?he?simply?grabbed?us?and?escorted?us?back?down?the?stairs.?The?noise?of?our?discussion,?however,?had?reached?Baba?and,?as?we?arrived?at?the?bottom?of?the?stairs,?a?message?came?from?Baba?that?we?could?have?His?darshan?for?one?minute,?provided?we?did?not?disclose?His?identity?to?anyone,?and?that?we?did?not?bow?to?Him?or?touch?His?feet. We?were?delighted?and?eagerly?reclaimed?the?stairs?and?stood?at?attention?on?the?small?balcony.?Baba?came?with?His?alphabet?board?in?hand.?He?touched?His?forehead,?and?the?interpreter?said,“Baba?says?you?are?very?fortunate.?I?arrived?here?yesterday?in?the?night,?and?you?are?here?today!”?Baba?went?on?to?assure?us?that?not?only?me,?but?our?friends?and?relatives,?would?also?be?able?to?have?His?darshan?before?He?left?Kashmir,?but?that?would?not?be?for?some?time.? I?returned?home?but,?after?seeing?Baba,?I?was?in?such?a?state?of?mind?that?I?did?not?feel?like?eating?anything?the?rest?of?that?day?or?night.?The?next?day?I?left?home?early?in?the?morning?and?walked?to?the?Majestic?Hotel?in?the?hopes?that?I?might?be?able?to?catch?a?glimpse?of?Baba?if?He?went?out?for?a?walk. Halfway?there,?I?felt?sorry?that?I?did?not?have?any?flowers?with?me.?Just?then?I?saw?a?man?with?a?big?bouquet?of?flowers,?elegant?enough?for?a?Viceroy’s?table!?I?knew?such?a?bouquet?could?not?be?had?even?for?a?very?high?price,?but?on?my?asking?for?it,?the?man?readily?handed?it?to?me.?I?was?astonished?and?I?gave?him?some?paltry?sum?which?he?accepted?without?a?murmur?and?then,?still?without?saying?a?word,?he?went?away.?In?His?own?miraculous?way,?Baba?had?provided?me?with?what?I?had?wished?for.?But?now?my?problem?was?that?I?knew?I?should?not?go?to?the?hotel?itself.?I?consoled?myself?by?thinking?that?I?wouldn’t?go?to?see?Baba?Himself,?I?would?simply?hand?the?flowers?over?to?one?of?Baba’s?disciples?or?a?bearer,?and?they?could?pass?them?on?to?Him. I?took?courage,?and?the?bouquet?of?roses?too,?in?both?hands,?entered?the?hotel?and?looked?about?for?a?disciple?or?bearer.?But?no?one?was?in?sight.?I?climbed?the?stairs?and?what?a?surprise?there?was-Beloved?Baba?standing?alone?as?if?He?were?waiting?to?receive?the?flowers!?He?silently?gestured?that?I?simply?place?the?flowers?at?His?feet.?I?did?so?and?then?retreated?with?a?mixed?feeling?of?guilt?and?bliss.?Baba?was?smiling?and?His?face?was?even?more?radiant?than?the?sun?rising?over?the?Himalayas! Showers?of?Grace?compiled?by?Bal?Natu?Copyright?1984